Alright, listen up—can we talk about this for a second? Like, I’m serious, what is going on with people trashing Volodymyr Zelenskyy? I swear to God, I’m losing my mind here! This guy—this poor freakin’ guy—he’s out there in Ukraine, going toe-to-toe with Vladimir Putin. Putin! You know, the guy with nukes and a total disregard for international law, human life, and basically everything that isn’t him? Yeah, that guy!
And somehow, somehow, people are sitting around, flappin’ their gums, like, “Oh, why are we helping Zelenskyy? This is expensive! It’s not our fight.” Oh yeah? You think? Well, how about this: maybe it is our fight. Maybe we just let the dude do his thing because, frankly, if he fails, we’re next. You think Putin’s just gonna stop at Ukraine? Like, “Ahhh, you know what, this country was delicious, I’m full now.” No! This guy’s like that one cousin at the family barbecue who keeps grabbing burgers and doesn’t care who’s watching. He doesn’t stop until someone pulls the plate away!
Zelenskyy is basically taking on one of the two countries on the planet that we don’t wanna mess with. You know it, I know it. There are two countries where you go, “Yeah, maybe we don’t poke the bear.” China and Russia. That’s it. But Zelenskyy? This guy’s out there with a slingshot, trying to fend off a freakin’ bear by himself! And you’re gonna sit there on your couch, drinking a Diet Coke, judging him?
The guy’s fighting for his sovereignty! For his people’s right to live free! You ever think about that? He’s literally defending their homes, their kids, their livelihoods from a guy who would burn it all down just for sport. And even if you don’t give a damn about any of that—which says more about you than it does about him—how about this: he’s putting his own soldiers in harm’s way. Not ours. So we don’t have to! Do you see the math here? It’s like, “Hey, Zelenskyy, here’s some guns, do your thing, and we’ll be over here, nice and cozy, eating pizza and watching football, while you handle the dictator.”
And sure, sure, it’s expensive. I get it. But I would rather throw money at some weapons—that we’re making here, by the way—than throw people at the problem. You wanna be the one explaining to some family why their son or daughter’s not coming home because we didn’t help when we could’ve? No? Me neither.
Look, the weapons aren’t growing on trees, okay? They’re made by American manufacturers, and guess what? That means American jobs! People are getting paid to build these things, they get to go home to their families, and sleep in their nice warm beds safe and sound because their work is helping someone else fight the war. I’ll take that trade-off any day.
And let’s get real—Putin’s gotta be dealt with sooner or later. The guy’s a bully. You remember what your mom told you about bullies? You either stand up to them, or they take your lunch money for the rest of the year. Forever! So, honestly, I’d rather someone else does the reckoning. And guess who’s doing it? Yeah, Zelenskyy. He’s taking the punches, while we’re in the corner, splashing water on his face and handing him the gloves. We’ve got the easy job!
But no, some people are like, “Well, why don’t we just let Russia have Ukraine? What’s the big deal?” Are you kidding me?! What, you think Putin’s just gonna stop? Like Ukraine is the grand prize, and once he gets it, he’s gonna retire and start painting happy little trees like Bob Ross? Get real! He takes Ukraine, and then he’s eyeing the next spot like, “Hey, Moldova, how you doin’? Lithuania, you’re lookin’ fine today.” And then what? We’re supposed to wait until he’s knocking on our door, like, “Hey, you got any sugar?” No thanks.
Here’s the thing, people: by helping Ukraine, we’re saving lives, saving money, and saving time. You wanna know what’s really expensive? A world war. Yeah, I said it. We don’t need another one of those. And if we don’t help Ukraine now, you bet your ass we’ll be paying later, and it won’t just be in dollars. It’ll be in lives. Our lives.
So next time you wanna complain about how much it costs to help Ukraine, maybe think about how much it’d cost to not help. Think about the price of not standing up to a bully. Think about your kid, your brother, getting sent off to fight this guy when we had a chance to stop it early on. I’m with Zelenskyy on this one. Let him do the heavy lifting. We just gotta keep handing him the tools. It’s the least we can do.
And if you can’t get behind that, maybe it’s time to come up for air! Vlad’s lap is a little too crowded for your face right now!
