So Donald Trump just signed an executive order saying everyone has to show voter ID and proof of citizenship to vote in federal elections. That’s right—he looked at democracy and said, “What if we made it more like the DMV?”
Let’s break this down. First of all, there is no epidemic of non-citizens voting. That’s like saying there’s a rash of dolphins sneaking into polling stations. We’ve checked. State election officials checked. Federal investigators checked. Trump’s own fraud commission checked. They came back with nothing. Nada. A big steaming pile of nope.
But sure—let’s blow up the voting system to catch a crime that isn’t happening. That’s like burning down your kitchen because you thought you saw an ant. Spoiler alert: it was a raisin.
So what’s the plan? To vote now, you don’t just need an ID. You need a passport, a birth certificate, or some other magical scroll that proves you popped out of an American uterus. Who has that stuff? Rich people. People who haven’t moved fifteen times in the last decade. People who weren’t born during a blackout in a town with more cows than doctors.
And who doesn’t have it? The elderly, poor people, people in rural communities, people who lost everything in a hurricane, or a fire, or just the abyss that is the Department of Records. Basically: all the people Trump would really prefer didn’t vote.
But wait, there’s more! The executive order also bans counting any mail-in ballot that arrives after Election Day. Even if it’s postmarked before. So if you live in a place where the mail runs like it’s powered by a confused donkey? Sorry, your vote is just a really patriotic coaster now.
And let’s be clear here—this isn’t about “election security.” This is about making voting so complicated that people give up. It’s democracy by obstacle course. “Oh, you want to vote? Great! First, you must scale the Wall of Documentation, wrestle the Clerks of Confusion, and survive the Gauntlet of Arbitrary Deadlines.”
Trump doesn’t need to prove voter fraud exists. He just needs to say it does, loudly, over and over, until people stop asking questions. It’s like yelling “FIRE” in a crowded theater and then installing sprinklers that shoot out voter suppression.
This is about shrinking the electorate until it fits in Mar-a-Lago.
Because here’s the truth: if everybody votes, Trump loses. That’s it. That’s the whole thing. So instead of trying to win more votes, he’s trying to make sure fewer people can cast them.
It’s not just bad policy. It’s not just dishonest. It’s cheating. In slow motion. Wearing a red tie and waving a birth certificate like it’s a backstage pass to American democracy.
And we’re supposed to just let that happen?
Nah. Not today. Not on our watch.
