You know what news is supposed to do? Inform people about things they don’t know. You know what news isn’t supposed to do? Use what people don’t know against them—like some overachieving know-it-all with a superiority complex and a clickbait addiction. And yet, here we are. CNN, the valedictorian of “mainstream media nobody trusts anymore,” is this week’s Skidmark of the Week for an article so sloppy, it makes the local weatherman look like Edward R. Murrow.
Let me explain.
This week, CNN published a piece on Ontario Premier Doug Ford—you know, the guy who’s basically Canada’s version of your loudest uncle at Thanksgiving. Ford said something about retaliating against potential U.S. tariffs by cutting off energy exports to states like Michigan. Fair enough, that’s news. But CNN couldn’t resist adding a little spice, could they? No, instead of calling Ford what he is—a provincial leader with as much federal power as a PTA president—they decided to call him a “Canadian official.” A Canadian official. As if Doug Ford moonlights as Justin Trudeau’s best buddy or Canada’s Minister of Passive Aggressive Apologies.
Imagine if This Happened in the U.S.
Let me put it in perspective. Imagine Gavin Newsom, Governor of California, gives a speech about banning avocados from Texas. Now imagine a headline calling Newsom a “U.S. official.” You’d think President Biden just declared war on guacamole. That’s what CNN just did to Canada. They made it sound like Doug Ford’s comments represent the entire country, not just the province of Ontario. This isn’t news—it’s the geopolitical equivalent of writing “Guess who just filed for divorce?” and then revealing it’s your neighbor’s cousin’s hairstylist.
“Canadian Official?” Really?
Calling Doug Ford a “Canadian official” is like calling a mall security guard a “law enforcement officer.” Sure, it’s technically not a lie, but you’re playing fast and loose with the truth. Ford governs Ontario, which is kind of like being the governor of Texas if Texas had universal healthcare, legal weed, and way fewer guns. But Ford doesn’t speak for Canada any more than Newsom speaks for America, and CNN knows this. That’s what makes it so bad. It’s not ignorance—it’s arrogance.
A Joke Gone Too Far
And the timing couldn’t be worse. This mess lands right in the middle of a PR disaster over a joke that went too far. Apparently, Trump joked about annexing Canada, relegating Trudeau to the role of “Governor of Canuckistan,” and Canadians didn’t laugh. You can’t blame them—Canada is like America’s nicer, smarter sibling who gets dragged into every family argument. So, with tensions already high, CNN decides to throw in this headline that basically says, “Yeah, all of Canada is mad at the U.S. now. Just FYI.”
Great job, CNN. You’re like a guy who walks into a bar fight, throws a drink at someone fighting someone else, and then yells, “Kick his ass” while filming it for TikTok.
Media’s Job is to Inform, Not Instigate
Here’s the thing: the media’s job is to inform, not instigate. It’s not supposed to exploit what people don’t know to create drama. But that’s exactly what CNN did here. By calling Ford a “Canadian official,” they’re banking on the fact that most readers don’t know the difference between a premier and a prime minister. They’re counting on confusion. And why? Because confusion gets clicks. Confusion drives engagement. Confusion gets people arguing in the comments section—and nothing says “journalistic integrity” like turning the news into the intellectual equivalent of a Facebook fight over pineapple on pizza.
An Opportunity Wasted
This could’ve been a teachable moment. CNN could’ve explained how Canada’s government works, like a fun crash course in Civics 101. They could’ve said, “Hey, Doug Ford runs Ontario, not Canada, so this is more like a state-level spat than a national crisis.” Instead, they took the easy route—the lazy, sensationalist, clickbait route. And that’s why they’re this week’s Skidmark of the Week: because when they had the chance to educate, they chose to agitate.
Final Thoughts
At the end of the day, calling Doug Ford a “Canadian official” isn’t just misleading—it’s irresponsible. It’s the kind of thing that fuels distrust in the media and makes people say things like, “I get my news from memes now.” And honestly, can you blame them? If CNN can’t get something as basic as Doug Ford’s job title right, why should anyone trust them to get the big stuff right? It’s like trusting a chef who burns toast to cook a seven-course meal.
So congratulations, CNN. You’ve officially become the guy who spreads rumors at the office Christmas party and then pretends to be shocked when HR gets involved. Take a bow. You’ve earned it. But maybe next time, stick to the facts, not the fiction. Because the news should make us smarter—not make us dumber in the name of clicks.
