So, picture this: The U.S. Institute of Peace, this nice, well-meaning organization that does exactly what it sounds like—helps countries NOT go to war—is just minding its own business. It’s been around since 1984, probably has a very polite breakroom, and every single person who works there is the kind of person you’d trust to water your plants when you’re on vacation. And then—bam!—the Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) busts in like it’s starring in an action movie nobody asked for.
DOGE, in case you’re wondering, is the bureaucratic equivalent of that guy at work who keeps insisting everyone should switch to standing desks and that your office doesn’t really need a microwave. Its whole job is to decide what government programs are “unnecessary,” which, let’s be honest, usually translates to “anything that helps people.”
And this week, they decided that peace—PEACE—was unnecessary.
The Heist, Government Style
This wasn’t some polite “Oh hey, we’re cutting your funding” move. No, no. DOGE raided the place. They showed up with armed law enforcement, like they were taking down an underground crime syndicate. The only crime the Institute of Peace has committed is probably sending too many emails that start with “Just circling back!”
At first, the USIP staff was like, “Um, no, you can’t come in.” DOGE then pulled the bureaucratic equivalent of shaking the vending machine until a Snickers falls out. They literally went to the home of the institute’s chief security officer to try to force their way in. Because nothing says “we’re the good guys” like showing up uninvited to someone’s house with a clipboard and threats.
And when that didn’t work? They went full villain mode, forcibly removing USIP President George Moose and his staff from their own building. Which is, uh, illegal. A federal judge even said this behavior was “abominable.” Not questionable, not unfortunate, but abominable. That’s the kind of word you use when talking about a war crime or a casserole gone horribly wrong.
And Then… Nothing?
Now, you’d think that after a federal judge basically said, “Hey, maybe don’t terrorize a bunch of people who are literally just trying to stop wars,” there’d be some kind of consequence, right? Like, at least a strongly worded email? Nope. The judge didn’t stop the takeover. Because, well… complicated legal stuff. So, DOGE is still in there, probably redecorating and replacing all the peace posters with a big sign that says “War: It’s Fine, Actually.”
Why This Is a Flaming Dumpster Fire of a Precedent
The U.S. Institute of Peace is supposed to be independent, meaning it’s not supposed to be yanked around by whoever happens to be running the government at the time. This takeover basically tells every other independent institution, “Hey, if you do something we don’t like, we will bust down your doors and take over your office.”
And what does it say to the rest of the world? “Yeah, yeah, we say we believe in democracy and peace, but honestly, we’d rather just storm in and take what we want.” You know, like the governments we usually yell at.
So, what’s next? The Library of Congress gets raided because DOGE thinks reading is inefficient? The National Parks Service gets booted because trees don’t turn a profit?
We are now living in a country where peace was literally dragged out of its own office. And if that doesn’t make you nervous, congratulations! You must be rich enough to have your own bunker.
