Alright, sit down, folks. It’s time we have a little chat about how the world actually works — because apparently, some people out there think you can condense international finance, immigration, and federal budgeting into a few angry tweets. It’s like trying to summarize the plot of Game of Thrones in a fortune cookie. Doesn’t work.
So, here we are, once again with Outrage Barbie, a.k.a. Tomi Lahren, popping off on Twitter, swinging her fists at the Secret Service for not having enough money to protect the three most divisive people on the planet: Joe Biden, Kamala Harris, and the one-man storm front, Donald J. Trump. But here’s the kicker: Congress is the one handing out the cash to the Secret Service, and guess who’s been in control of Congress? Yeah, the same group who’s now clutching their pearls because shooters are getting a little too close for comfort.
Foreign Spending Saves Lives, Believe It or Not
Let’s start with this gem from Lahren’s tweet: “Let’s stop sending all our money overseas.” Yeah, because foreign aid is just a big ol’ charity donation, right? We’re just handing out fat checks to other countries because it makes us feel good. Wrong.
Here’s the deal: foreign spending keeps the world a bit less chaotic. You think you can just ignore countries falling apart at the seams? You know what happens when governments collapse? Refugees. Lots of them. War. Terrorism. Global instability. And who do you think gets dragged into that mess? Us. So instead of waiting for that dumpster fire to spread to our front porch, we throw a little cash their way to keep things from going full apocalypse.
It’s like maintaining your neighbor’s house so it doesn’t burn down and take yours with it. Except in this case, the fire comes with IEDs and insurgents. So yeah, foreign spending saves American lives. You can scream about it all you want, but that’s the reality.
Importing Impoverished People Makes Your Groceries Cheaper
And then we get to the next bullet point of ignorance: “Maybe we should stop importing the world into our country.” Oh, here we go. The classic, “immigrants are taking our jobs and bleeding us dry” routine. I hate to break it to you, but you like those cheap groceries? You like that $1.50 avocado? Thank an immigrant for that.
The reality is that immigrants — especially the ones from impoverished countries — do the jobs that most Americans wouldn’t touch with a ten-foot pole. You think Billy from the suburbs is going to spend his summer harvesting strawberries in 100-degree heat for minimum wage? Yeah, no. He’s at home figuring out how to make money on TikTok.
Those “imported” workers are the reason you can afford to stuff your face with affordable food every week. If they weren’t here, you’d be paying $10 for a head of lettuce, and the only thing you’d be stocking up on at Costco is debt.
Macroeconomics Isn’t a Soundbite, Tomi
Here’s where things get really dicey. People like Lahren, and others in the outrage-factory business, like to distill macroeconomics into these one-liners that fit in a tweet. “Stop spending abroad.” “Immigrants are stealing our jobs.” “The government is wasting our tax dollars.” But macroeconomics is a giant, confusing, messy puzzle. You can’t just slap a sticker on it and call it solved.
Reducing complex systems like international trade, immigration, and government budgets to a soundbite is not just lazy — it’s dangerous. These are the kinds of half-baked ideas that lead to bad policy decisions. It’s like saying, “Why don’t we just nuke hurricanes?” It sounds tough, but it’s moronic. And what’s worse is that people buy it. They hear these little one-liners, repeat them like gospel, and suddenly we’ve got an army of people demanding policies that would sink the economy faster than a cement block in a lake.
Now, About That Secret Service Budget
And finally, let’s talk about the elephant in the room: why the hell is the Secret Service struggling to protect the President, the VP, and Trump? Did we all forget Congress controls the purse strings? The same Congress that’s been run by Republicans for how long now? And yet, somehow, they couldn’t find the cash to beef up security for the three most high-profile political figures in the world? Two assassination attempts in as many months — and you’re telling me we don’t have the money?
Let me get this straight: we can afford billions in tax cuts for the wealthy, but we can’t find enough money to make sure a few shooters don’t get within spitting distance of a former president? Where’s that fiscal responsibility you’re always preaching about when it comes to protecting lives, huh?
But no, it’s not Congress’s fault. It’s the Secret Service, apparently. And foreign aid. And immigrants. You know, the usual suspects.
Here’s an idea, next time you hear someone reducing a global, multifaceted issue to a 240-character soundbite, ask them if they’ve ever picked strawberries in 100-degree heat or tried running a government. Because this ain’t it, chief.
