Picture this: Madison Square Garden, packed with Trump supporters, and here comes Tony Hinchcliffe, mic in hand, ready to fire up the crowd. And what does he start with? Well, he calls Puerto Rico a “floating island of garbage.” You can practically hear Puerto Ricans collectively sighing, “Oh, really? That’s what we’re doing now?” because nothing says “respect for American citizens” like equating them with ocean trash, right?
But, hey, this is bigger than one guy with a tasteless joke. It’s 2024, folks, and while we’ve got our shiny smartphones and cars that parallel park for us, we still have 3 million U.S. citizens in Puerto Rico who can’t vote in the presidential election. Yes, you heard that right. They’re citizens—real, red-white-and-blue, tax-paying, military-serving Americans—but when it comes time to vote, they’re stuck watching the democratic process like it’s the world’s worst Netflix show they can’t pause or control.
Now, don’t get me wrong—Puerto Ricans get a little say if they move to, say, Florida or New York. But back on the island? Nada. It’s like they’re welcome at the BBQ as long as they don’t bring a plate, a napkin, or, heaven forbid, a vote. Meanwhile, territories are a dream for the IRS, because Washington still makes sure to collect those taxes. Oh, they’re all about taking the taxes, but when it comes time to hear what Puerto Ricans actually think? Crickets.
And remember, the Trump administration’s love affair with Puerto Rico is already legendary. They tried to divert hurricane relief funds, joked about selling the whole island, and now they’re letting the guy with a microphone at a rally pile on the insults. Nothing says “thank you for your sacrifice” like turning disaster relief into a punchline. The irony? These citizens of the U.S.—yes, citizens—serve in our military. They’re defending freedoms that, apparently, don’t extend to their own voting rights.
So, let’s be clear. This comedian’s roast was more than just a “bad joke.” It’s a bitter reminder of the American double standard: if you’re from Puerto Rico, Guam, or another U.S. territory, you’re good enough to be taxed, to serve in the military, but not quite good enough to vote. It’s like the most dysfunctional Thanksgiving dinner ever—you can sit there, smile, and pass the rolls, but for heaven’s sake, don’t you dare ask for a vote on the main course.
And maybe that’s what Hinchcliffe’s audience needs to hear: that in the end, we’re denying Puerto Ricans and others a basic right while happily pocketing their contributions. So next time anyone’s tempted to dismiss this as “just a joke,” remember that behind the punchline are real people left without a voice in a democracy they help sustain.
