Alright, folks, we’ve got Kevin O’Leary—Canada’s own dollar-store Tony Stark—constantly yammering about U.S. elections. This is the guy who, during a Fox Business appearance in September 2024, called Kamala Harris’s economic plan a “destroyer of the U.S. economy” . Now, I’m not saying O’Leary isn’t good with money (he’s a millionaire from selling crap on TV), but he’s not even a U.S. citizen. Why do we keep handing him the microphone like he’s the voice of America? If I wanted unsolicited advice, I’d ask my Aunt Barbara about my love life. At least she’s American.
But hey, let’s play a game: who else would we not want chiming in on our elections? Imagine asking Vladimir Putin for pointers on democracy. You’d get a straight-faced, “Well, you start by poisoning your opposition and hacking their emails. Easy!” Or what about Kim Jong-un? “Well, I suggest you just declare yourself leader for life. Works for me!” How about the Queen of England (RIP)? At least she’d say it politely, “Perhaps consider listening to your colonies for once, dear?”
Honestly, Kevin O’Leary weighing in on U.S. elections is like letting your cat pick your stocks. The cat might think it knows what’s up, but in reality, it’s just playing with buttons. This guy’s from a country with healthcare that won’t bankrupt you if you sneeze wrong, and he’s over here lecturing us about how Bernie Sanders’s healthcare plan is basically communism? Kevin, go enjoy your free doctor visits and let us figure out how to not go broke from an ambulance ride, okay?
The fact that U.S. media keeps platforming O’Leary is beyond ridiculous. Fox Business, Yahoo! Finance, you’re giving him more airtime than he gets on Shark Tank, and for what? It’s like putting a toddler in the driver’s seat of a Formula 1 car. Sure, they’ll yank the wheel, but nobody’s getting to the finish line in one piece.
And while we’re at it—can someone explain why we’d ever need any foreign voices trying to influence our elections? The next thing you know, we’ll have Borat weighing in: “Very nice! I like-a your policies but maybe less healthcare, yes?” Hell, at this rate, we’ll have the Pope giving us advice on healthcare reform. “Blessed be the deductible, for it shall ruin you financially.”
Look, if you’re not a U.S. citizen, and your vote doesn’t count here, then maybe just stay in your lane. And Kevin O’Leary, maybe just stick to the realm of overpriced infomercial gadgets and leave the future of the U.S. economy to the people who actually live here.
I love Canada. I love Canadians and I have both friends and family from Canada. And even they understand I don’t want Canadians messing around in US politics any more than they want Americans, messing around in Canadian politics. We may be sibling nations, but even my older brother knows better than to tell me how to conduct myself with my wife and my kids unless I ask!
